Inspiration and lessons for your leadership journey!
“The success of love is in the loving - it is not in the result of loving.”
We are a results-oriented society and culture – one could even argue we’re a results-oriented species. From the time we are born until we die; success is all about results.
“Let’s take a look at what you drew, Johnny.”
“Did you get an A on the test?”
“How’d you do on it?”
“What percent of the fourth graders passed the STARS test?”
“Did he graduate?”
“What’s the score?”
“Did they win?”
“What are the sale’s figures for last quarter?”
“Here’s how we’re doing on our metrics…”
“What are the patient/customer satisfaction scores this quarter?”
“The percent of engaged employees for your department is…”
“What’s the net margin?”
“What legacy do you want to leave?”
While I realize and preach the importance of mission statements and setting goals, today’s quote from Mother Teresa challenged me to stop and think. If you read this blog with any regularity at all, you probably consider yourself at some level to be or striving towards being a more consistently loving leader and you might be challenged, too.
Like me, you entertain the notion that by loving those we serve, we can achieve greater results; both tangible and intangible. So let’s explore her challenge just a bit.
Mother Teresa’s challenge is to let go of the results and live, lead, and love in the moment for its own sake. That’s where she is saying success is found.
Success has been defined in so many ways and too few definitions include elements of love. In my latest book, A Travel Guide to Leadership, I quoted Robert Holden, PhD, “If your definition of success has little or no measure of love in it, get another definition.” So first, our very definitions of success should include or be part of a loving response to a need.
So if our goals and metrics have some measure of love in them, we can now let go of the focus on the result and focus on the response in the moment. We can focus on our call to lead and love. It is in the act of loving – focusing on the here and now with love – that we succeed. Easier said than done, for sure.
Let’s remember this week that the success of love is not in the results. But rather, nurture the success of love; and, whether it turns out the way we want or not, know that the value of what we have done – loved – is in and of itself success.
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Alan Mikolaj is a a professional, experienced, positive, and passionate speaker, leadership and organizational development consultant, change agent, author, and coach. He holds his Master of Arts degree in Clinical Psychology from Sam Houston State University. He is a certified graduate coach from Coaching Out of the Box and holds his ACC and membership with the International Coaching Federation (ICF).
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In his third book, A Travel Guide to Leadership, Alan offers you simple, fundamental, and powerful lessons that have the power to transform you, your relationships, and your career.